So Glad You Wrote

Yesterday I received an email from Steven I. Weiss. Without introduction, he told me that I was one of a "select group of foodbloggers." He had some questions that he wanted me to answer about Glad Press 'N Seal Wrap. So many questions. Have a purchased it before? Do I think it's a good value? How would I rate it on a scale of 1 to 100? What uses have I found for it in my sexual activities with my husband...ok, he didn't ask that, but he might as well have. He wanted me to respond to his queries by return email or POST MY RESPONSES ON MY BLOG. Why, Steven, aren't you fresh!

Dear Steven,

We have to talk. You're a really nice guy and all, but I can't go on like this. I'm afraid you're not being straight with me. I don't even know the real you anymore. Sometimes, late at night, when I think about us, I wonder if you're hiding something from me, something you just don't think I'd understand. And maybe when your not writing me emails, you like to sit in rooms with sophisticated ladies that talk about the "taste-making influence of food bloggers in grassroots marketing efforts" or "co-opting the authentic voice of foodies for new product launch initiatives." You know, things that you tell me not to worry my pretty little head about. I just worry that you might be into some really bad stuff, like gorilla marketing...Oh, I know, we've had thrilling converstations about the greatest plastic wraps of the world while my husband was away on business trips. But it just feels wrong, you know, like the way that using Glad Press 'N Seal to create individual baggies for wrapping single portions of bologna feels wrong.  It pains me to say this, but we're over. Just don't contact me again. I'll try to move on with my blog being a place where I write about food without regard to the economic benefits to Glad or any other corporate interests, and you can go on doing whatever it is you do.

By the way, you owe me $3 for my opinion about a bad use for Glad Press 'N Seal. Sealing up bologna with it is just wrong.

Drawing the line,

Jennifer

Comments

[Steven I. Weiss]

Jennifer - Most cute. But totally useless. You haven't helped me at all, dear, and now I just don't know what to think about Glad Press 'N Seal Wrap.

[Meghan]

Krikey. Marketers and advertisers are kinda sinister. I really hope that the food blogs I love to read don't have bizarro product placements in the future. The mind boggles...

[ghostrider]

Wow. I just recalled that, 40 years ago (give or take a couple), Time magazine ran a story about sex on campus which noted that many collegians were using plastic wrap as a birth control device.

It's amazing what lies buried in memory, just waiting for the right trigger to bring it back to consciousness.

I don't know whether to thank Steven I. Weiss or curse him for creating this moment.

[Cigar Jack]

I've found Duct Tape to be more effective at keeping things sealed. :) Of course I'm the type of freak that would use a cordless drill as a substitute for an electric mixer.

[Charlie]

"I really hope that the food blogs I love to read don't have bizarro product placements in the future."

One: have you looked at AdBlogs.com?

Two: would you make the same complaint about a newspaper or magazine?

[New Jordans 2011]

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